"We are simple people, but we have our ways" going from humble modesty to a subtle threat is INCREDIBLE. Well done! Magnificent story--I've subscribed, can't wait for more!
Really well done! Great job! I know i said it already, but I love the way you used the repetitions at the story's close. I think it helped to convey a sense of ominous foreboding.
Haha yeah that phrase came to me as I was ending the story, and it just sounded so cool to put that at the end, so I knew I had to back and found the place to put it in the beginning to achieve that effect. Glad it worked ;)
I do the same thing with a lot my essays. I find a good hook or a chorus and thev start finding other places to put it. I try and create a structure with it or around.
I do like this! Well done Alejandro. It's been mentioned already: love the threat at the end! I don't think they are that simple a people! :)
Haha thanks! Hope we'll get to see more ;)
You’ve got a fan in me.
Thanks! Really appreciate how encouraging you all are. ❤️
Excellent story. I love the simplicity of the prose, and the repetition of the key elements. It's almost like a folk story in its cadence.
Thanks, that's really kind!
I like it!
"We are simple people, but we have our ways" going from humble modesty to a subtle threat is INCREDIBLE. Well done! Magnificent story--I've subscribed, can't wait for more!
Thanks! You're all way too kind in the fiction community, for sure.
The looping lines of musical refrain are superb at the end!
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This is my first attempt at discovery writing, zero prior plan. I had a lot of fun.
Really well done! Great job! I know i said it already, but I love the way you used the repetitions at the story's close. I think it helped to convey a sense of ominous foreboding.
Haha yeah that phrase came to me as I was ending the story, and it just sounded so cool to put that at the end, so I knew I had to back and found the place to put it in the beginning to achieve that effect. Glad it worked ;)
I do the same thing with a lot my essays. I find a good hook or a chorus and thev start finding other places to put it. I try and create a structure with it or around.
liked it
That was brilliant!
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